Currently Listening to: "0330" by U-Kiss
One who has never experienced hurt has never experienced life.
It's hard.
I know it is.
To be tossed aside--to be the second choice of somebody.
Especially somebody who meant so much to you.
Especially somebody who made you feel so infinite.
Especially somebody who made your stomach feel funny every moment that you were with them.
Especially somebody who you dedicated every thought of yours to.
Especially somebody who you thought loved you.
Especially somebody who you thought you loved.
But you know what's even harder?
Smiling.
Pretending.
Trying to convince yourself that you had no feelings for that person when you, as a matter of fact, did.
More likely than not, you loved him, didn't you?
But you refuse it, right?
Because you don't want to be pitied?
Because, to be honest, you feel sort of embarrassed?
Because you don't want to admit that you're heartbroken?
Because half of your life is dedicated to crying every chance that you're alone?
But you don't want anybody to see it, right?
You don't want anyone to know how hard you fell.
But, more importantly, you don't want yourself to know.
You're trying to convince yourself that all those feelings were false.
Right?
You're angry.
And you're sad.
But most of all, you're hurt.
"How come it was so easy for him to just leave me?"
"What did I do wrong?"
"Am I not worth it?"
Well, here's a newsflash for you.
You're beautiful.
You're smart.
You're hilarious.
You're incredible in every way possible.
And you know what else?
His loss.
It may hurt now, I know.
And it may hurt the day after.
And it may hurt a month form now.
Or maybe even a year.
But, one day, you're going to wake up and realize that there are plenty more fish in the sea, as cliche as it sounds.
That day will come, I promise you.
But until then, lean on me.
Share your burden.
And until you are able to walk on your own, I will be here every single moment that you need me.
In days both bad and good, I'll be here.
So, rely on me.
You can cry, and yell, and smile, and laugh, and mope with me.
Because I'm your friend.
And because that's not what friends are supposed to do, but because this is what I want to do.
I love you, Kezia.
Always.
